There are two great self-realization “epiphany” moments in life:
“I am different from my ideas.”
“It’s my fault.”
Knowing that you are not one-in-the-same with your ideas liberates you. You can change your ideas like a pair of shoes. Someone criticizing your ideas won’t insult you personally because they are merely criticizing your ideas, not you.
Knowing something is your own fault frees you to do something about it. You can’t change anything or fix any problem unless it’s your own fault. Maybe it’s only your fault for not having improved.
So, try on this idea: It’s your fault.